Been really busy the last few days... It feels on some days as if there is nothing wrong. I just go about my normal day to day routines as if nobody has told me anything. It is wierd, but I am thankful.
Round 2 of chemo is in a few days and just like before I am a bit nervous. I am only nervous because I feel like it may be worse. I have no reason to think that but I still do. I have been laying around more the last few days because my white blood counts are low and I do not want to get sick. My hair will be gone soon and then the big announcement to the whole world that I HAVE CANCER is out there. Feeling mixed emotions on that but will deal with it as it comes.
I have been getting wonderful dinners, weekly house cleaning, and cards in the mail to ease the stress. Guess what...It is totally working. I don't feel stressed 99% of the time. (Should I feel guilty for that since there are so many out there that are stressed) I am going to start a team for the Cancer Center run/walk. It will be Mar 20 at 10am. We get shirts with ribbons on them to decorate how you wish. It should be fun. If you are interested call me. Any reason to wear pink is good enough for me. I am going to try and find the Pink Brittany wig!! I may sing the whole time too, so beware of that before you sign up!
As you can see laughing at myself really helps to ease the stress of this too! You may be wondering, does this mean she is not taking things serious enough?? I assure you I am! I think about the fact that I am pumping my body full of toxic crap for the next six months because someone told me that it needed to be done. I think about how quick this came on and how next time (if there was a next time) I may not catch it so quick. Then what?? I think about what would happen to my kids if I didn't wake up each day. What would they think, say, do?? so... Please don't think that those horrible thoughts don't cross my mind more often than not. Here is the thing though, I let myself have those thoughts as they come and acknowlede them all as just that....thoughts. Then as quick as they come I let them go. I refuse to sit and think constantly about things that are not in my power. I do however feel better when I laugh about those things that are causing me such drama. That is what this blog is for I guess (Cheap therapy)
What makes me the happiest though, is that I have a disease that can take my life from me and I can still some how smile at the end of everyday (NOTE: I didn't say ALL day just by the end :) ). If I can do that now the small crisis's of the moment seem much more manageable!!!
Here is my words of wisdom for today: I asked my 2 year old, "What is the secret to a good life?" No jokes here is what she said..........."DANCING!"
Now as you all know I have this part covered because I win all the dance offs we have! So thats it for today if you want to be happy go and do some dancing today! Peace out and MAKE IT COUNT today!
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