REACH FOR THE BANANAS

I heard a story about monkey's the other day that I would like to share with you today....

There were a group of monkeys that were being studied. They put a tall pole with bananas in the area with the monkeys. Each time that the monkeys tried to climb up and get the bananas they were blasted with water. They soon became conditioned to not try and climb the pole to get the bananas. Over time they left the pole alone completely.
Then a new twist. A new monkey was added and when he went to go climb the pole for the bananas the others in the group pulled him down each time and would not let him climb the pole. This monkey too eventually got to the point in which he did not even attempt to climb the pole. He was conditioned without even trying to climb it and learning the lesson himself.
Then one by one the conditioned monkeys who had climbed the pole were replaced with those who had never climbed the pole one at a time. The monkeys one by one repeated the same pattern of pulling the monkey who was trying to climb the pole down until the new monkey was also conditioned to leave the pole alone.
By the end of the study EVERY monkey in the place had never ACTUALLY climbed the pole and been sprayed with the water. The entire group of monkeys left the pole with bananas alone completely never having even attempted to get them!

The reason I share this story today is because a great person I know shared this story with me and said, "WAY TO GO AFTER THE BANANAS HOLLY". that made me cry!

In life we are conditioned on many things. Many of us don't ever attempt to try things simply because we don't think we can/should or have been told by others that we are crazy for trying this. I just put my notice into my job that pays me in order to dedicate more time to my children and a non-profit org that pays me nothing. I did this because I feel in my heart that it is the right thing to do and I see something that they obviously do not. There have been many people along the way that have tried to pull me down from going after that banana and they have even called me crazy. Maybe I am, but how many AMAZING THINGS in life have come from someone that was once called crazy?

My hope today is that everyone who reads this takes that chance themselves and tries to get the bananas. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do something and if you get sprayed with water...try another way. Don't settle :)

Is it weird that I feel like eating a banana split right now??? Have a great day and reach for the bananas!

Top 10- Why I love being a cancer survivor

This one is for all my survivors out there!!!!



Top 10 Reasons: Why being a cancer survivor is great

1. The contradictions....Getting back my hair so I can hate it all over again. oh how I love to hate you!

2. Living in a Haze....Feeling similar to those who lived through and participated in Woodstock minus the good 30 years of life I needed to have to have been there. The brain cells are lost but without the great party to go with it!

3. New found Strength...Feeling like I should be walking down the street with the Destiny's Child song, I'm a Survivor, playing in the background as I walk.

4. The medicines....Oh what fun it is to have the hot flashes, stomach pains, nausea, and mood swings. Thankful they have drugs out there that I can now BLAME all of these symptoms on every month! :)

5. The attitude...living with the attitude that if I don't want to do it, I DON'T! No more people pleasing 24/7 now its just more like 20/6!!

6. The colors...I have a license for the rest of my life to sport my favorite color in everything I own!

7. The people...They look at me different now. I was once fragile to them like a piece of glass...now they know I could kick any thing's a**!

8. The doctors...they are gone now except for when I am sick. Lucky for them I NEVER GET SICK, well...except for this stupid cancer thing...but other than that...I NEVER GET SICK!

9. The others...Love the connections with others like me...wait there are no others like me....just kidding, excited for the chance for all of us a** kicking, drug using, pink wearing tough chicks to get together and make some changes in this community! Watch out world!

10. My family...On a serious note, my love has grown where I thought it couldn't. My list of things to be thankful for has magnified by 100. I know that better or worse and in sickness or in health are NOT just words exchanged! I felt love like many may not and I am thankful, proud, and happy to have had this experience!

Time to blossom

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anais Nin

I love quotes and I am always trying to find the perfect one for the perfect time. I read this one this morning and I love how it fits my life.

I have been on a roller coaster for the last year. I mentioned in yesterday's post that I went down good old memory lane yesterday looking at some of my pictures. I had tears in my eyes looking at these. The whole time I had cancer I wondered why everyone was so sad and why they couldn't see that I was the same old Holly. After looking at the pictures yesterday, I see now. I was sick. I never felt that sick, never really acted like I had a disease, and never really let cancer interfere with what I wanted to do. I ran, I worked, and shuttled my kids to their activities. I did all this because one day I was "normal" Holly and the next day... I wasn't. I refused to believe that I was different. Now, after looking back, I see what they saw. I smiled in every pic but in my face...you can see that pale "life sucked out of you" look under that smile. It was hard to look at.

Now humbled by experience, I live each day as if it's the last and I am thankful each and every time I open my eyes!

The road ahead is unknown for me. I see the end and what I want to happen with FBW and my life. I am slowly making the choices to move me closer to that path. It is unknown but it is more painful to stay here in one place than it is do take the chance. I am a few seconds away from this quote and when the time is here to blossom... I will be ready!

Advice

Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself.
Marcus Tullius Cicero

Advice...I love this one today because everyone LOVES to give you advice, don't they! One thing I have learned about advice is that we all like to give it, but receiving it is a different story. I was and have been in a family services field for many years and my job often times IS advice, but how do you give advice to the one who doesn't want it (or think they need it)? The answer: you don't. You try and guide them to a point where they can come up with it themselves.

I have received lots of advice from people on cancer, having kids, and even my job. The quote could not ring more true that only you can give yourself the best advice because only YOU walk in those shoes everyday! i am not saying that I don't appreciate each piece of advice that I am given, but really at the end of the day I am the one calling the shots.

I was looking today at some pictures of me from this time last year. Wow I LOOK sooo sickly! I was shocked today to see how sick I actually looked in these pics. I never thought I was sick so to see these was tough. It even brought a few tears. It was a rough road but when I spent the whole time laughing I forgot to note that I was actually sick.

So my advice to you today....take your own! (I am still working on giving less and using my own more!)

Tales of a 3 year old drama queen

I have a 3 year old daughter. She is very dramatic,strong willed, very emotional, and very FUNNY. I have posted about this bossy little gal before. She loves to sing, dance, and make believe. She has an amazing memory that she chooses to share or not. I have seen it so I know it is possible but she is very stubborn so it really is a matter of her deciding to share her knowledge.

Last night she had ballet class. It still makes me laugh watching her.When she chooses to dance she pushes her lips together, walks back and forth, and moves her hips side to side. she has such attitude. She has been in dance for a YEAR but still doesn't always listen (or even dance at times). The funny part is when we come home, every position, every move, and every stretch she will share with us. She marches to the beat of HER drum and on HER beat I guess. :)

This morning as I finished my shower I could hear her screaming....MOM, MOOOOOOOM. I rush to see what the problem is and she says......"Do I need to keep my underwear on today??"

yeah, that is life with a 3 year old drama queen!