I HATE CANCER!

The more I think I have life figured out the more I realize I don't have clue.

I have hope, faith, love and all that stuff but sometimes it's just not enough. I start to wonder... do we make more of a difference on people when we are gone rather than when we are alive? If that's true then why do we spend so much time trying to make a differnce now? I live each day thankful to wake up. I have a disease that can kill me when it wants. It may or may not be 100% over. That is a strange concept to accept. The only way I am able to live well right now and after this is over is to treat this as any great battle. When I win... it is over. That's it. If it comes back... then we fight again! I won't stop fighting till I am not able to fight anymore.

I am so sad today thinking about others that have this stupid disease. So many have lost their battles or have to fight this over and over. Why do some make it and some not? The most difficult stories to hear about are with children. It just doesn't seem fair. I realize we live in a very unfair world, but children... This is disease needs to be gone! I am filled with tears thinking about others that lost their battles when I am kicking this things a**. Why am I any different? Will I have to fight again? Maybe this point is when your faith is really tested and I have to trust that I am still here for a reason. The quote of the day fits well here today too....

Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.MLK Jr.

I guess no matter what my path has in store I will just KEEP MOVING FORWARD! This is and has been my motto from day 1!! I occasionally have to remind myself of that, but I feel I have been pretty true to it!