Time to blossom

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anais Nin

I love quotes and I am always trying to find the perfect one for the perfect time. I read this one this morning and I love how it fits my life.

I have been on a roller coaster for the last year. I mentioned in yesterday's post that I went down good old memory lane yesterday looking at some of my pictures. I had tears in my eyes looking at these. The whole time I had cancer I wondered why everyone was so sad and why they couldn't see that I was the same old Holly. After looking at the pictures yesterday, I see now. I was sick. I never felt that sick, never really acted like I had a disease, and never really let cancer interfere with what I wanted to do. I ran, I worked, and shuttled my kids to their activities. I did all this because one day I was "normal" Holly and the next day... I wasn't. I refused to believe that I was different. Now, after looking back, I see what they saw. I smiled in every pic but in my face...you can see that pale "life sucked out of you" look under that smile. It was hard to look at.

Now humbled by experience, I live each day as if it's the last and I am thankful each and every time I open my eyes!

The road ahead is unknown for me. I see the end and what I want to happen with FBW and my life. I am slowly making the choices to move me closer to that path. It is unknown but it is more painful to stay here in one place than it is do take the chance. I am a few seconds away from this quote and when the time is here to blossom... I will be ready!