Top 10 for the Holiday Season

Wow I can't believe Christmas has now come and gone. It was such a quick but wonderful few days of celebrations. We had so much to be thankful for this year.

Here are my top ten highlights of the holiday season......

10. Snowboard Trip: Finally a light bulb clicked in my head! I finally did it with minimal falls and no broken bones or even bruising! This for me is a HUGE feat! As I rode down my last run of the day (it was blue by the way!) I had not even fell down once. I decided to yell over to my husband who was next to me at the bottom of the mountain. I yelled, "HEY! I made it to the bottom of the mountain without FaaaaaaaLINGGGGGGGG!" And.... BOOM... fell right there as I neared the base of the mountain (right next to a sign that read: SLOW!)

9. The Dogs: Well after that great snowboard trip I returned home to yet another lesson in 'Stuff is just Stuff'! The cute cuddly puppy ATE my couch! Not just chewed but shredded a part of my couch! Oh the memories of Christmas!

8. The Wallet: It is Christmas should I really elaborate much more on this??? I guess I could just look at it as a wallet clean out, so when I get some money again I will be able to buy a new one!!!!!

7. The Food: What a great holiday for over-eating, too much junk, and way too many leftovers! The food was good but the extra unwelcome pounds are really not!

6. The Sales: Here is my new plan, we don't celebrate Christmas till Dec 27 next year. That will give us one full day to go and shop the same exact things that we would have bought before Dec 25 at 50% OFF! It is funny how every store now has their LOWEST PRICES EVER sale after people buy way too much stuff at their LOWEST PRICES EVER SALE!

5. The Decorations: The lights, the tree and red and green decor that were once so excitedly put up is piled one by one into a box to look at again in a year. I think we need a year to have the energy to do this all again!

4.The Family: Anytime a family gets together the music is loud, food is good, and people....well they are crazy!!!! I love the big get together but even more than that I love that feeling when every guest has left. It is a sit on the couch and let out a big sigh....we did it kind of feeling!

3. The resolutions: We all make them. What will it be losing weight, budgeting better, organizing your place or mind, or eating healthier? We are so lucky there are places putting everything for those resolutions on sale or gyms running specials! Will you keep them though, that is the question!

2. My husband: The date day snowboarding and the Christmas shopping together were great. I am so thankful that he is such a wonderful father and husband. We got to spend 5 days in a row with him and enjoyed each one of them. Now if he would just cut that hair!!!! :)

1. My kids: This by far is the greatest thing about the holiday season. The best part of this crazy money filled holiday season is by far the look on their faces Christmas morning looking at presents and the wonder that they show when they see an empty cookie plate! At the end of the day that smile, the thank yous, and the hugs make all of this craziness worth it. And think about it...in 363 more days till we do it all again!

Anniversary Day

Well I am posting today because I will be celebrating a very special day tomorrow. I will be hitting the slopes of the mountain tomorrow celebrating this special anniversary and won't be here to write about it. Can you guess what anniversary it is????
One year ago tomorrow, I heard the words that nobody wants to hear, "You have cancer". Now if you have read this blog at all you would remember that I really didn't "hear" those words and was so drugged up that it really is a blur. You get the idea though. Last year, I was the reason everyone's Christmas was a little more solemn. I was the reason that there were secret tears at Christmas instead of laughter. If it was up to me, even now, I would go back and hide it from them all (at least till Dec 26)! I felt as if I had RUINED Christmas for everyone. They all were crying and cursing and I...I just wanted to start a treatment plan that day! It was scary and unknown for us all, but I knew that day that my life was going to change! It really did too!

At first, I felt I had ruined Christmas. I soon discovered that I gave it more meaning. I think now especially this year and this day (well tomorrow) will stand out in minds of my family forever and make everyone a little more thankful for ME (just kidding, for each other)!!! What I initially thought of as the biggest curse and the most horrible thing in the world, turned out to be one of the best things to happen to me to date! Calm down I don't mean I want to do it again or that I didn't do my fair share of complaining. I just mean that since hearing those words I have done great things. I have showed myself and anyone watching that, "YOU NEVER KNOW HOW STRONG YOU ARE TILL STRONG IS YOUR ONLY OPTION". I showed all of them (I Hope) that if you can laugh and enjoy having cancer, you really can enjoy ANYTHING. I also have discovered that I love to write. I have debated heavily if I should quit writing on this blog now. I mean I don't have cancer anymore and don't even know if anyone reads this either! What I have decided though is it doesn't matter....if nobody reads this or a million read this, it doesn't matter. I write because I love it and it's in my heart. Wouldn't it be great if we could all find that one thing that we would do in life for free!!! I have thanks to cancer.

Today (and tomorrow) I will continue to be thankful each day I am allowed to open my eyes and hug my kids and my family. I will use what I have gone through to help as many people as I possibly can! I will live and love and most importantly (to me) LAUGH every single day. This Christmas will be the greatest one, not only because I am here but my family doesn't have to watch this fight anymore! I love each and every family and friend that has made a difference in my fight. From cards,phone calls, facebook posts, dinners, and all the way to babysitting each one of you made a difference in my life. Each time I needed a boost, YOU were there to pick me up. I will never be able to repay each of you for these acts no matter the size, but I WILL spend the rest of my time here on this earth trying to pass this on to someone else who needs it!

I hope each person out there looks at Christmas a little different this year even if it's only for a minute. Be thankful for what you have and TELL them. The greatest gift you can give someone this year is to tell them how they changed your life!

One year ago (tomorrow) I heard the words that nobody wants to hear but those words are the ones that changed my life. The view from the top of this mountain was worth every step I took to get up to the top!

Screams from the morning

Oh how I love the sounds of screaming in the morning.....

I think it is funny how I attempt to have this normal little life, but it is so not even close. I often feel I am in a house full of divas!

Lets talk hi its deacon.how are you doing.what are you doing.
This is what happens when you walk away from a laptop in my house...6 year old bloggers......

Well as I was saying through the screams of the morning... Aren't kids wonderful! My son was sick ALL DAY yesterday and spent the entire day on the couch. Today he is 75% better but is making up for giving me one day of quiet. Today he and his sister have some make up fighting to do, and oh boy are they ever. They have fought about who is standing too close to each other, TV choices, facial expressions made to each other, and any other item possible. It is wonderful. No really it is. If my life was not like this I really would not have much to write about! :)

My daughter is a 3 year old drama queen. Her most recent performance was this morning. She decided that she was ready to eat breakfast and her servant (ME) was not moving very fast. After asking for cake mix for breakfast and being denied three times she huffed, scowled, and dramatically went to the fridge for some sausage. Before settling on sausage she did throw her hair back and say "I QUIT" and turned the light off on me.....what she quit exactly I don't know! :)

Oh well I am over the moon that I get to stay home here for the next 2 weeks. I am certain there will be many posts of my Vida loca! I will love every second of it! Who knows maybe someone will read this thing one day and this could be my job!? I would never run out of material! In the words of my little diva, "YOU ARE THE BESTEST!" Have a great day!

Someone else's eyes

I feel as if post-cancer I have someone else's eyes. I have really been trying to think of how to describe these thoughts and this seems to nail it on the head. I am approaching the one year mark of the day I heard those words (well kind of heard them, I was pretty medicated). I was one person this time last year and now I am someone different. I was stripped of all things and now I am doing my best to rebuild it all. Just as if a natural disaster has happened and leveled my home. I can rebuild but it will be different. You can't go back after you have been here and new normals are needed. I am finding myself caring less about the stuff and superficial things that make our world go around. I am caring more about WHAT I do with my time! This goes against so much of what the world seems to think, but I really don't care! I know how limited my time may be here and I want to do so much before it's done! In the process of revising and adding to my bucket list! I have so much to do!

I am going to a concert tonight, Carrie Underwood, who I love listening to. More than than that, I am going with my sisters and mom. The concert will be fun but the memories we will make along the way will be so much better! I may have someone else's eyes but I still have all the things that make me who I am.

Best Christmas Pageant Ever

No holiday season would be complete without a preschool Christmas pageant. It is the highlight of my young child years. I only have a few of these left and I love them so much. These things are great because there is singing, dancing, acting, overacting, and no acting! There is always the kid that sings the song louder than everyone else slightly off key. There are the kids that say, "No that's not the right line". There are those who refuse to participate and those who you could not drag them out of the spotlight. Sounds a lot like adults doesn't it? We have have all of these personality types too!

Last nights program certainly did not disappoint. There were all of the typical preschool Christmas pageant kids. It was great. One of my favorites was the boy whose mom said "Hi" as he walked down the isles of the church. She was taking a picture of course and he looks at her so irritated and said, "MOM I gotta go now!" I also missed but heard about a great fight between two lovely little angels on the stage. It was broken up and only scowls were exchanged instead of tears. I am bummed I missed that one but I hear it's on tape.

Let's not forget my little angel....or diva whichever. When she first entered the stage area she had her typical fingers in her mouth. Then they did an angel dance and she was right at home on that stage. When the angels headed up the isle they all pretended to fly down the isles (great picture opp right?). Well after all of the others flew down the isle I kept looking for Miley. She was the last one. Ok no big deal, but I still could not see her. There was a long break in angels and it looked like that was it. I started to wonder where she was. Right about that time I see her in the foyer looking around at flowers, talking to one of the shepherds and just generally doing her own thing. One of the teachers realized she had not gone and grabbed her. She walked slow down the isle and when she saw me she stopped and smiled. When she finally made it to the stage to sing her songs she stood there with her hands folded in front of her and her head tilted to the side and smiled the whole time. Well that in between every minute or so waving saying, "hi mom, hi grandma, and hi deacon" (she couldn't see dad and grandpa videotaping on the sides) She belted her songs and did her actions that went along and did great.

Now you would think the funny part would all be from the preschoolers but I did take a 1st grader with me too! After the fifteen minutes of him asking me every 30 seconds if it was time to start, asking if I had gum, and when did we get to have the cookies, the show started. During the show I do have give him credit he was really good. Now when we hit the cookie table that is when the good must have ran out of gas. He and my daughter grab like 5 cookies and then say, "we want cake". They did not eat all of that if you are wondering. :)

The evening was wonderful and I could not have asked for a better show! I am so thankful that my wonderful kiddos give me such great stories to tell! It really was the Best Christmas Pageant Ever!
"

Sigh of Relief

Big Sigh of relief today!

The roller coaster I have been on for the last week has finally come to an end. Last week I discovered another lump right around my scar site. I attempted to remain calm, but this is no easy feat when you have been through what I have been through in the last year.
The lump has been checked out by several wonderful doctors and it is nothing of concern. What a weight lifted off my already heavy shoulders. I am so happy about this that I am completely ignoring the fact that my wonderful puppy has destroyed my carpet. It's just stuff. It's my stuff, but whatever, i am too happy to care right now.

I really am hoping that in the next years ahead that the panic mode doesn't kick in every single time I feel something strange. I am sure it will, but it is a nice thought to think that I can remain calm. I will fight again if needed but I sure would like to refrain from chemical warfare for at least a full year!!! When I was going through cancer I would never have told anyone that it was bad. Now that I am not in the middle of it... I can see just how bad it really was and how bad I felt. I just kept in control of my outlook and everything went better than expected. I wonder if it's because I had no idea what to expect. Oh well, lessons were learned and I feel better for it. that really is all that matters! :)

Life is changing for me yet again. I can't say why just yet, but the winds of change are blowing me in a new direction. I am finally going to take my own advice and do something that I have been wanting to do. How it will all pan out....I have absolutely no idea. That, I think, is the best part. What a journey it has been so far. I have laughed, cried, been angry, and inspired. I hope that the new chapter will be filled with all of these too. I love a good story!

Is the grass greener?

Well the grass is always greener on the other side isn't it? That's what they say anyway! My dad had a million of them. In the last year I have really come to see these in full light. There are so many old sayings that have stuck in my mind over the years. It makes me think of my parents words that I once mocked. Oh come on you know the ones like, "If I have to turn this car around...", and "Nothing good happens after midnight". I remember these sayings like it was yesterday that my parents muttered them to me over and over and over.

These sayings, that I am certain were given to them by their parents, have stuck around for good reason. Think about it....what good REALLY happens after midnight??? As a teen, NOTHING! As an adult, AGAIN NOTHING!!! When do you think all the Dui's happen, kids get sick, or thoughts run aimlessly though your mind.

Then there is my favorite "Do I have to turn this car around?" This always makes me laugh because I have used this as a parent. It really is a great tool to keep your kids in line on long car rides isn't it? Well at least until they get smart and say, "yes...we wanna go back!!!" :) Think about it, do you really want to say that when you have just left like Disneyland or it's equivalent to your kids??? I don't think so! This one has stuck around for good reason too, but it is a different reason than the first. The first was true, so it made through multiple generations. The second however, this is just a "payback" from your parents. It is their attempt at "I told you so humor"! As soon as we use this and it backfires what do we do? We call our parents and thank them for putting up with so much. This is a "parental insurance policy". They paid their dues for many years and this saying is a guaranteed bet that you WILL appreciate what they did for you!

Then there is that grass. It will never be as long, short, green, or as thick as your neighbors. This saying always will ring true to me. I remember having no hair after chemo began. I had two wonderful handpicked wigs. The wig hair was never the wrong color, cut, and I hand picked them. One day I decided that I didn't like my hair as much as my friends hair. Really? I can't help but laugh because when I had hair I hated it. When I lost my hair I wished it would come back. And now that it is back, well take a wild guess on my thoughts on it! This saying is not only true for hair, bodies, houses, and stuff but life as a whole. Why can't we just be SATISFIED with what we are given? That is why this life lesson has survived because it speaks so much to life.

Whether your grass is green, you turn the car around, or are enjoying the wonders of after midnight just remember one little thing....Life is made up of powerful moments that can teach us so much. Take each one for what it is worth and learn from them all. You will then realize that the grass maybe greener somewhere else, but your grass is YOURS!!!!!