Goals

Set your goals high, and don't stop till you get there.
Bo Jackson

I am so glad this is the quote of the day. For those of you who talked to me yesterday, Thank U! I was having a BAD day and I appreciate all of your words of support to help remind me of what I need to be doing. Some days are just like that and oh boy when it rained, it poured.

Last night after a long day working, doing Friends of the Bald Woman stuff, and running my daughter to dance class I tried really hard to think of something that had gone right. It was actually really hard because yesterday was one of those days where everything seemed to be going all wrong. Today I am looking back wondering if it was all going wrong or I just could not get my perception of things straight. I think it was my perception. The events of yesterday were nothing I haven't dealt with a million times before, but typically I would just brush them aside and move forward. Yesterday...No such luck! It feels as if on those days that the reason for having just one bad thing after another is because that is all you are looking at!

Finally by 8:00 last night I picked out a wonderful thing that happened and only focused on that. For those who do not know, a wonderful radio personality here recorded a PSA for us at Friends of the Bald Woman yesterday afternoon. An hour or so later I was headed home from work and caught the tail end of the ad! What a great way to get our name out there! I was thrilled.

The last few days I have been doubting quite a bit what I am trying to do. I want to help people that have cancer because I KNOW how much these things are needed here in this community. I struggle because I have to now convince a world of this during "Awareness" month. You would think this would be easy, but it is more difficult than I thought. Why don't people understand that 1 out of every 8 women will end up with breast cancer and 8 out of 9 of them HAVE NO FAMILY HISTORY! If you got cancer wouldn't you want support, help, caring people checking in on you, and knowing that you are not the only 30 year old in the town with cancer (sorry that was my issue).

The quote today says set your goals high and don't stop till you are there and that my friends, is what I intend to do!

Awareness or HELP

Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossible before they were done.
Louis D. Brandeis

I raising more than awareness this month folks. I will help these women fight this fight! I realize that people don't just go out start a non profit on somewhat of a whim, but I...am not people! I am a cancer survivor and I believe that now I can do just about anything I feel like! :)

I will do the impossible and change attitudes or I will die trying!

Today I am thankful for being here another day to fight this stupid disease. (or to help others to fight it). We will be raising money to not just create awareness but actually help those who are diagnosed each and every day! Feel lucky it is not you yet, but nobody is exempt from this thing and I am LIVING proof of that. If this happened to you would you want awareness or HELP! Friends of the Bald woman is going to be that HELP so join us!

Have a "magical day" (that is what they say at Disney World and it just doesn't work as well unless you are there!

Just another day

The screams of kids fighting in the morning make a day start out great! I have two "always right" kind of kids so it makes for some great arguments! They are always so important too, like I am going to school today, NO your not, yes I am, no your not! (get the drift) They argue pretty much every time they are together. I can only imagine what the teen years will hold....can't wait. New thing started today that is too funny. My son decided when I told him no he would say why. (that is not the new part) As I am answering him he covers his ears????? What is this? Didn't he just ask me why?

Does it seem insane of me to want to be here with them more than I am??? I am starting to think so.

I had a genetic test done the other day and I am still waiting for the results. I hope that they are negative because then my risk for certain cancers is pretty much the same as the general public if it's negative. (I kind of feel like no matter what my risk is 50/50. You either get it...or you don't!)

FBW wristbands are on their way. We will sell them for $2. I am working on the t-shirts too. We are having a yard sale on the 23rd and we are doing a FBW calendar and looking for chemo patients to be the stars of this project. I am also planning a Bald Woman Costume Party for Halloween. I realize it sounds like a lot to do and it is, but it needs to be done. I am ready to start helping people. If we have no money then we can't help anyone. I hope that this is successful and I wouldn't have dumped so much of my own money in if I didn't believe in it. We will organize the group for young cancer patients, we will help patients get food, house cleaning, wigs, and even the genetic testing that often is not covered by insurance. We will also raise awareness and hopefully change a few stereotypes along the way. This is all happening while holding a part time job(25hrs a week), being a mom to a 3 and 6 year old, and somehow having a life too. It may take me longer than I would like, but I will do it. That is a fact!

Don't be afraid to take a risk, to go after what you want even if seems impossible. There is nothing that can't be done. You just have to know what you want. I think I finally do!

Like a Cheesestick?

Today I am so grateful for my kids. They are so wonderful and pretty funny. They must get it from me huh!?
Miley, who is 3, and I were rocking out in the car to one of my current favorite songs. We were singing and dancing to Like a G6. When the song ended however she kept going independently. She starts moving from side to side with the most serious expression and says, "Like a cheese stick, like a like a cheese stick" I have been laughing all morning. Too funny. Maybe I should have fed her lunch before we went out?

Always learning

Don't go through life, grow through life.
Eric Butterworth

This is appropriate for today! Speaking gig #2 (the high school) went....well, it went. I have never seen such a quiet room of high school students. Am I losing my touch here? My great friend Letty taped it and I watched it back. It was not as bad as it felt up there, but boy when did I age like a generation!? Apparently I did. When did this happen? I am going to try and not beat myself up about it too much today because we have to learn and grow right. I was pleased to see so many students up so early in the morning to be supporting such a worthy cause! I am thankful for the opportunity and for the realization that we are as young as I feel. That being said I think I will stick to survivors and groups who get my "cancer can be funny" kind of humor. I think you can find humor in everything but some maybe just don't understand why I am making light of such a serious thing. It is not that I don't think it is serious (believe me and read my old posts if you don't believe me), but I just wanted them and anyone else to see a different view. We all know the crappy side of cancer. Let's do our best to look something good or find humor where there is little. Positivity will take you far!

Oh well, live and learn, right? Thanks to the High School for letting me come and share a different side of the coin! I hope the Pink Week is extremely successful!

Do things happen for reasons?

They say things happen for a reason. Today I struggle with this more than before. I thought my life was going to take a turn in a certain direction. It did not.
I now am trying to analyze (or maybe over analyze i am good at that too) what I really want. If I get real with myself I know what it is. I just don't know how to get there. I believe that today is definitely one of those moments that not getting what you wanted may be the best thing that has ever happened, but only time will tell.

Here is what I do know....

I want to be with my kids every second I can. Life is so short and so is our time with them. I want to be a mom first and everything else can take a number.

I love laughing. It makes the world a better place and we need to do it EVERYDAY!

I want to help as many people as humanly possible. I want women of all ages, shapes, sizes, hair type to know and BELIEVE they are beautiful for who they are as a person.

I want to leave a mark here on this earth. I want to leave something that is lasting and permanent.

I want to be thankful for at least one thing each and everyday.

I want to change lives!


So now I have all this great knowledge of what I want to do, NOW WHAT?
The rest as they say "is still unwritten"............

The Unknown

I don't know what is on the road ahead
I keep going towards the unknown
Been feeling lost and confused
Wondering what it is that I will be shown

I am doing what I think is right
who knows now because it's all a mess
Each time I think I get it
In my head I seem to second guess

I have been on a journey of a million miles
and that path was always winding
I went and went towards what I didn't know
without a doubt or even minding

I feel I climbed a mountain
and made it to see the top
Words can't describe the view up there
so I just begin... and then I stop

They will never know till their lives
take them to this place
I hope for them they get there soon
and see the world's beauty and grace.

So for now I just move forward
toward that unknown place
I see the world with different eyes
but walk with the same smile upon my face.